Editing Humour

I’ve been collecting examples of writing and editing humour, and thought I’d post some editing jokes here to give you a chuckle! (If you originated one of these and would like your name added to it, just let me know … and if you have other great examples, let me know and I’ll add them to the list, too). And keep posted for more writing and editing jokes coming in this humour series.

  • A pregnant woman went into labour and began to yell, “Couldn’t! Wouldn’t! Shouldn’t! Can’t!” She was having contractions.
  • If you leave alphabet soup on the stove and go out, it could spell disaster.
  • If two wrongs don’t make a right, then why does a double negative make a positive?
  • Prof: “In English, a double negative forms a positive, but there is no language in which a double positive can form a negative.” Student: “Yeah, right.”
  • Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven ate nine!
  • Why did the comma break up with the apostrophe? Because it was too possessive.
  • Why did the comma break up with the question mark? Because it questioned everything.
  • Why did the comma break up with the exclamation mark? Because it was always yelling.
  • What’s the difference between a cat and a comma?
    A cat has claws at the end of its paws, and a comma is a pause at the end of a clause.
  • I’m writing about all the things I ought to do before I die. It’s my oughtobiography.
  • How do you irritate an editor? The list is to long too fit hear.
  • I avoid clichés like the plague.
  • The streets were oddly desserted that night. (Illustrate that sentence!)
  • “I didn’t do nuthin’!” “Ooooh! A confession!”
  • Which two letters of the alphabet mean nothing? MT
  • If you want to change a light bulb, how many editors do you need?
  • The way this is worded does not conform to our style guide.

What other editing jokes can we add to this list? Share yours! Thanks!

Want to see more writing and editing humour? Check out these posts:

Editing Humour
Punctuation Humour
Spelling Humour
Humorous Quotes about Writing

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